Self Evaluation Blog #4

For my last essay I had very few grammatical errors marked on my paper. What I could have done to make the paper flow was use lead-ins for book information. For example instead of writing, "In FFN......", I could put, "Eric Schlosser's Fast Food Nation describes..." What I learned in this reading and writing process was how to use your sources to back up your thesis. Before I would struggle to find more words or find a different perspectives. But i learned that if you use your sources right then it is easier to prove your case. It is also possible to get carried away with the information from the outside sources so i have to make sure that i put three times more of my input than information in the essay. Throughout all the essays I have learned that grammar is very important to your writing. Whatever you write down and whatever grammar patterns you use the reader is going to reader and that pretty much sets the whole tone and voice for the paper. What i discovered while attending class this semester is that writing and critical thinking is not only limited to something that you do in the classroom. Critical thinking can be applied to everything in life and writing is your way of expressing it. This class has definitely helped me become a better writer and to understand the whole writing process on a different level. This class also helped me in the writing process by showing that there are different sources that you can use for writing besides book in a library or stuff on the Internet. Not only is it easier to write, I learned that writing could be interactive and not just plain and boring like " The Banking Concept."

Self Evaluation Blog #3

Again, for this essay grammar was not a big deal. I did not get any points marked down for grammar. From draft one to draft three I think that the hardest part for me was making sure I made myself clear on my thesis. It helped me a lot because we when over the prompt on class and Beth helped me fill in any holes in my logic. There was not one thing that did not help me on this essay. The workshops were good too because i got to read my thoughts out loud and correct any flaws.
Nothing really changed for me on understanding grammar and how important it is to the reader that you have correct grammar and punctuation. I think now I am at the point where I am comfortable with grammar patterns that I use but now I feel I could take it to the next level to make my writing sound and look more sophisticated.
The lecture that helped me a lot was the one Prof. Roberts did in class on the classic argument. I used the lecture to structure my paper and i definitely made the P.I.E structure more manageable. I learned a lot about the topics of regulation in this learning unit. It opened my eyes to a lot of different issues that are happening in the world. Very interesting.
On this essay I got the worst score out of the whole semester. The main reason I got points taken off was the MLA formatting. I do not think I will ever be able to master MLA but I have improved with each paper. I have also learned what not to do with MLA in each essay I write.

Prewriting Blog #4

Since I wrote my last essay on the morality and ethics in the meat packing industry I think for this essay I'm going to write about the civil rights movement that is happening with prop 8. I think that our generation needs a movement because in a way it forces us to really prove that we can change the future not only cause it but be able to know when we need change and to make that judgment call. Our generation also has to prove that we are capable of the change.

I understand how it relates to the readings because people in the meat industry were not getting the rights that they deserved and that applies to the people that believe in or lives will be compromised by prop 8. For the correlation from the reading to my essay I will compare the unfair treatment of the workers to the rights of the people against prop 8.

The primary outcome of the essay will result in me explaining how i intend to prove my arguments about the unfair action that is being taken in this modern day civil rights movement.
My audience obviously needs to understand where I stand on the issue and they also need to know the information in FFN to understand how the two issues are related. The dialogue I use will be direct so they know exactly what the point I'm trying to argue is.

Reading Blog #6

In our society the people that rule come from the US government. They make, interpret and enforce all the rules and regulations in our society. The definition of rule is : to control or direct; exercise dominating power, authority, or influence over; govern: (dictionary.com)

People rule in our everyday lives too, whether its your boss in the workplace or your parents. Their role is to direct society in the direction that is best for them as a whole. Sometimes people agree and sometimes they don't. And whther the followers agree or not decides where the direction of our country goes.

The roles of the people that are ruled are to take the information from the rulers and follow them to the best of their ability. The ruled are ultimatly the deciding factor for waht goes on in society because they are usually the majority.

post evaluation #2

1. I need to work on writing shorter and more concise sentences. I had learned that using shorter and more concise sentences are more effective than writing sentence full of information that can tend to be long winded and confusing to the reader. There were not any grammar errors noted.
2. What worked well for me was switching my introductory essay with my conclusion. By switching the two paragraphs I was able to make a more concise introduction for my thesis. I should have used more examples and did more research for the essay to make my point more understandable.
3. For this essay grammar for this essay again was just the wording in my paragraphs. I now understand that having a strong thesis will help with my focus throughout the essay and help me to make my thoughts focused.
4. I tried to stick to the pie structure as much as I could. The problem with my paper was making a better or stronger thesis for my essay and using it to make my point stronger. With my next essay I plan on using the PIE structure to make an outline of my draft that way the essay has flow and is clear enough for the reader to follow.

pre-writing blog #3

For this essay i am going to respond to the second prompt. I completely agree with Luther Standing Bear when he states “man’s heart, away from nature, becomes hard . . . lack of respect for growing, living things soon led to lack of respect for human too”. I believe that everything in life happens in cycles and that everything comes full circle. I also believe that when nature, spirituality, and family aren't part of your day to day life that you do lose sight of what's "close" to nature. What you do becomes who you are and if you are all business and work them that's what you will become. First you begin to lose sight of natural and humanistic things and then eventually you can become just a machine. In respect to FFN, I think that the leaders in the fast food industry have lost sight of that and have become just people looking to make a fast buck and then take over the world. And they already have. So hopefully everything will come first circle and we won't have a world dominated by Fast Food.

Reading Blog #5

I would sadly have to say that fast food does play a big role in my life. It actually is more apart of my life now than when I was little. When I was younger my mom was a full time mom so my family mainly ate homemade foods. But as I got older and as my parents started their own business it seems like as a family we eat fast food at least once a week. Because its fast, affordable , and easy it just seems like the obvious choice.
My memories of fast food always go back to McDonald's. All I can remember was thinking about getting that Happy Meal. That was one of the few fast food places my family ate at as a kid. The Play Place also holds some fond memories for me. The ball pit was my favorite. But now that I know just how unsanitary they were it kind of makes me cringe.